RULE CHANGE

I am changing the no two posts in one day rule. See, last night I posted but it was so late that when I post today it seeeems like the same day. However in my head nothing could be more different. Things I thought were solid yesterday seem fluid. I am stuck in that stupid slow motion time again, waiting for the same person I have waited for all summer. Is it worth it? YES. I know that the day will come when I look back on all the slow motion time and know for a fact that it was, no matter what turns out. I mean in a way, hes doing me a favor. He's making my summer go SLOW for once. Poem time.

Untitled

When I'm alone I watch the happy parts of movies
When I'm alone I drink milk straight from the jug
And nothings gonna stop me
no nothings gonna stop me
when I'm alone I can't fuck it all up.

When I'm alone everything is light around me
when I'm alone I see the distant dark
and nothings gonna stop me
no nothings gonna stop me
when I'm alone I see the heavens part

When I'm alone the silence grasps me
when I'm alone i feel a softer warmth
and nothings gonna keep me
no nothings gonna keep me
when I'm alone I call my devils forth.

When I'm alone I am real and worthy
when I'm alone I smile inside
and no ones gonna find me
yea no ones gonna find me
when I'm alone there is no need to hide.

When I am free I can't lose my bearings
When I am free I stand straight and tall
and nothings gonna stop me
No nothings gonna stop me
No nothings gonna save me from my fall.




Is this poem happy? Is this poem sad? I have been trying to decide that for a while now. I wrote three of the verses a long time ago and two today. Not in order, but I still don't know what I am trying to feel when it all comes out. Maybe thats what I am trying to convey, bittersweet. So really, not a new topic for me. Pretty much same old same old. I like this poem though. I really do. Ok hopefully I have nothing more to write today. I'm crossing my fingers but I don't believe in luck. Wow, that could be a good line in a poem. I think I will remember that one. Haha. I can't stop thinking in poems right now. Sometimes when I am alone, I talk into the mirror in a british accent and tell nursery rhymes about kings that I make up myself. Thank God nobody reads this blog. That admission could be the end of every friendship I have.